We know that dispute resolution including mediation is a great field. US News and World Report has declared "Mediator" as one of the best careers for 2009.
In bad economic times, people need help with conflicts perhaps more than ever. While mediation is not a substitute when legal assistance is needed, working out your conflicts with a third party neutral, or learning how to do it yourself, can save money, time, and heart ache.
Have you used mediation before? Have your kids learned to be peer mediators? Are you in a conflict right now that you need help with?
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I am in a very serious conflict right now, with my ex-husband and the Ohio Court system. I currently live in Michigan, 3 1/2 hours from my son, whom lives with his father, my ex-husband. He was recently "awarded" custody on the grounds that I have moved too far away, and that our child's time spent in the car is detrimental to his well-being, and on the grounds that I (the judge believed) decided to appropriate visitation at my sufferance. We were asked to go to mediation, but my son's father declined shortly before asking for custody. The reason why the judge felt that I was only allowing visitation at my sufferance was because I interrupted visitation for two months. I did this because I feared for my safety, for my son's father threatened to kill my new husband (because he is a jealous man, they had actually never met-so he could not have had any prior problems with my husband) and told this to our son, who was confused and distraught. He also hacked into my computer, called children's services and made serious false allegations against me, refused to settle his differences with me and concentrate on what was best for our son.
ReplyDeleteThe Magistrate's decision to reallocate parental rights did not remove any time spent in a vehicle, for our son spends just as long on the bus every week, and would not have to do so had he stayed with me. Also, I drive to Ohio every weekend to provide visitation between my step-son and his mother. If the father would have recognized that his move to enforce a custody arrangement that benefited him the most, was a huge disruption to everyone's lives, and in fact not good for our son, this would have not occured. We could have greatly benefited from a mediator... however without being able to show that one has a history of violent, criminal behavior, and poor judgement...I am not sure that a mediator could have helped.
...because my son's father probably would not have come to any agreements and would have taken me to court anyway, to keep the fight alive....
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